Monday, January 25, 2010

Why can't I sleep?

Q:
A:

(it's been a long time since I wrote bad poetry. this post isn't for
everyone. it's barely even for me. just wanted to experiment a little
with syllables and space. i actually have some fresh random stories to
share, but didn't feel like composing those tonight. just stay tuned)

My mother is far from good health right now
My sister is stuggling as well there
My father is tremendously stronger
Than I can ever imagine or hope

To be because I am selfish and poor
Of spirit, stamina, patience and poise
I lie awake with dumb inner concerns
But tonight I think of them fighting hard

While I watch football drink beer and listen
To podcasts and new purchases alone
Successfully isolating myself
Until I have to face the night and The

Next day when I will be working again
But they are surviving throughout it all
I call with nothing to say or report
They paint a picture they think is calming

But I see it when I'm visiting them
And when I last left I realized that
It's never been worse for them than right now
And I've never been better on paper.

I don't feel guilty because I think they
Need a win right now and I make them smile
My life brings some laughter and escape
Albeit very marginal to most

No wife and no kids is not a problem
No grad degree or fancy car is fine
They don't want more from me when I ask it
But they deserve more than my content life

This may be the first time they need me more
It's why I feel bad "nothing is new" for me
No correct answer or response exists
My mind, although stronger, is still hurting