Who was my roomate?

I've embraced TQ has my preferred nomenclature because of how common "Tom" is - especially in my extended family. It's the name of my Grandfather, two Uncles, two uncles, and more friends. It's no surprise that when I travel to the other side of the world, that I'm put into a room with someone also named Tom.

The above picture is one of my favorite pictures I took while in Sri Lanka. It beautifully illustrates the connection my roommate Tom made with the young students at the school. He was certainly a favorite of them - and you felt like they were all genuine favorites of him.






It did

What does S.A.S. stand for?

Our team in Sri Lanka in was 13 people strong. Each was obviously worthy of their own post, but there are just a few I want to publicly mention. For example our Team Leader 'Nique.

And when you mention 'Nique, you best mention her sister Mary-Lourdes as well. As one who likes to assign nicknames, I was quick to refer to the two The SAS.  SAS stands for many things, such as high quality sanding standards and bags of wine - but it literally stands for South African Siblings. Initially it stood for South African Sisters, until I met their brother at the tail end of the trip.

South African Sisters

Recently 'Nique has been transplanted to Boston, but her sister Mary-Lourdes is still keeping it real in Capetown. Both, on multiple occasions, suggested I visit Capetown someday - and that I'll have a place to crash there if I do. There are many things that I hope will happen one day for me - showing up in Capetown to see these characters is no doubt one of them.

Their brother, Manny, who I only met briefly at the tail end of my trip when Team India merged with our Team for our last weekend of R&R is also a character with character - but he won't be stealing his sisters' thunder here.

Before the trip, I (as politely as I could) hassled 'Nique about many trip details. She was very quick to reply, which in other words meant she was very quick to settle my anxiety. Once on the scene in Sri Lanka - she was on top of it.  What do I mean by "it?" I mean everything. The fact that I never had any worry the entire two weeks is directly associated with her tireless preparation.

Mary-Lourdes is as cool as cucumbers come. Being more reserved than her sister - there was nobody else on the team I wanted to make laugh or smile more. MySister usually laughs at my jokes regardless of their quality (and often - regardless of her comprehension of them), but when M-L laughs at a joke - it was earned.

These two better realize that they haven't seen the last of me.

How could the flight have been worse?

In my mind: this might have been an improvement

"The only way that flight would have been worse is if the plane had crashed." ~ MySister

My last day in Sri Lanka was Sunday August 14. I had woken up at 5 am in Kandy, taken a 90 minute bus ride to Columbo, waited* in the Colombo airport for 5 hours, flown four hours to New Delhi, and waited** 8 hours for our plane home to Chicago to board. This story is about that plane home from Chicago. It was a 17 hour flight - but it felt longer.

*There was another group flying out of Colombo earlier than us, it made more sense to wait the extra time at the airport instead of going back to the hotel and making another run to the airport.  **The layover in Delhi was relatively painless, we experienced a grand shopping mall that existed inside an airport and experienced McDonald's without beef as an option.

But by the time we had boarded Air India Flight 127, it was 1 AM. I had been awake for 20 straight hours and still had another hour before the flight would takeoff. That was the longest hour of my life.

The Boeing 777 jet was packed. MySister & I were unable to change our seats, which we desperately wanted because we were separated on the flight. The plane has a window-middle-aisle-()-aisle-middle-aisle-()-aisle-middle-window configuration: MySister was in one of the "side-middle" seats and I was stuck in a "middle-middle" arrangement. Same row, but just far enough away that we couldn't easily communicate with each other: we were both on our own.

The four seats to my left were for a family of four: the two parents, a 4 year old daughter, and an infant son. It was the second row of the economy (coach) section, and of the 18 passengers total in the first two rows, six of the passengers were crying babies... at 1 AM. But none of those six crying babies were my biggest problem. Immediately to my left was the patriarch of that family of four. I'm not happy to admit this, but I've never wanted to punch a man in the face more than him. The following are his offenses:

• Instantly removing his shoes and socks after seating
• Playing with the tray table as if he didn't know how it worked before takeoff
• Deciding to lean entirely on the armrest between us (instead of the other one on the aisle, that was shared with no one)
• Leaning his face clearly over the invisible border between us to read the book I was attempting to read
• Dancing feet, row seat shaking dancing feet (he was not listening to music)
• Punching his leg, violently, which he had placed on top of his tray table

Yes, he put his leg on the tray table. And yes, all of these offenses were occurring in the initial hour after I had boarded - before takeoff. While his leg was propped up on the tray table, he began punching it - hard. He wouldn't go 3 seconds before the next rabbit punch to his leg. I've re-enacted this scene to a few people, and each time I stress that I'm not hitting my leg as hard as he was his. The only one more bothered than me by this was the poor man in the seat ahead of him. Thank God nobody behind me had lifted their leg to lay on a table and begin rocking the hell out of it through calf violence.

It was only though a more bizarre act that I was saved on this flight. After we had taken off and the seatbelt light went off, that man moved away from me. He spent most of the flight making the rounds of the airplane and guarding watch over his family. Why would his family need a guard?  Because his wife was sleeping ON THE FLOOR OF THE PLANE! Meanwhile, his infant son was sprawled out along two seats and his daughter was standing on the third seat. If only I was an artist - I would illustrate how a mother could squeeze between two rows of seats in the fetal position under a tiny airline blanket.

Life Saver

My saving grace were my large over the ear headphones and my fully charged iPod. Specific thanks to the comic duo (and twin brothers) Randy & Jason Sklar. Their podcast helped me through that long journey. I had written them an e-mail of thanks after my arrival - and they replied in appreciation. I will repeat my sentiment in early December when I see them perform live (they usually sell merch themselves after shows).

Sadly, MySister was not as fortunate. The headphones she had brought were not as loud as mine - not louder than the many crying babies. Worse for her, she was flanked on both sides by less than positively fragrant men in a perpetual lean invading her personal comfort. The quote at the the post is very real - it was uttered before we even exited the jet-way at the terminal.

The entire situation left me more delirious than exhausted. I didn't sleep at all. All food was refused (note: if you think airplane food is bad, try adding curry to it). Did I get up once? NO. That's right - I freakin' locked myself into that "middle-middle," dialed my headphones up to volume 11 and RODE THAT FREAKIN' PLANE - RODE IT G.D. HARD.

You ran a marathon? Good for you. You swam a large body of water? Beautiful. I've had my endurance test - it was Air India Flight 127.

How much do I love Sri Lankan Airlines?

Srilankan Airlines is the greatest airline I have ever had the pleasure to experience. I was on it twice - from New Delhi to Colombo and back. Most certainly my evaluation was improved by its pairing with the long enduring trials of Air India - but even if you look at their characteristics in isolated terms, the quality shines through:

• The planes were either new, or were kept in new condition - the leather seats had a new feel, but more importantly it had a pleasantly fresh smel.
• I was able to watch episodes of The Simpsons on my flights
• The complimentary magazine was a worthwhile kept souvenir (I had to consult it when writing many of these posts)
• They weren't overbooked - on both flights MySister and I were able to have an open seat between us.
• The flight attendants are very attractive, and were wearing semi-midriff revealing uniforms.

Sadly, I may never have the opportunity to be their customer again. Most everybody knows that if I had to select a dream vacation, it would involve Las Vegas - but in that fantasy - I'll fly there on Srilankan Airlines.

How would you react to an elephant sneezing?

The picture above and the one immediately below were thankfully taken by a fellow BTCVolunteer that had a much more high tech camera that yours truly - and I'm forever thankful that they were captured, for they are my two most favorite pictures from the trip to Sri Lanka.

Both were taken at the Elephant Orphanage in Peradeniya. There was one specific elephant with a handler that you could pay to pet and get a picture taken. While MySister and I were close, the elephant sneezed. I didn't react - I was transfixed in a Am I really in Sri Lanka, touching an elephant, is this real? trance; Too paralyzed to move.  MySister, however, well you can see her reaction.

We saw more elepants there than a lifetime of American circuses. Add in the elephants we saw later that night on parade in Kandy and you have MySister saying, "I think we saw all the Elephants in all of Sri Lanka." Visiting the Elephant Orphanage was pretty awesome - we saw elephants being fed, elephants grazing about, and elephants washing themselves in a nearby river.

 

 

 

Random footnote: on the way back to Kandy from this excursion, we saw someone walking a porcupine on a leach.

What was the last memory of Sri Lanka?

My last night in Sri Lanka was spent in Kandy. I had mentioned that I would be in Kandy in one of my last posts before my departure, and a friend had a wonderful response to it. But we weren't there to visit a sweet shop, we were there because every August in Sri Lanka (the night of that month's full moon) is the Festival of the Tooth. We didn't see Kandy's Temple of The Tooth, but we saw its parade.

I have the feeling that you can not be told what the Festival of the Tooth Parade is, you must experience it for yourself. As someone who is a strong advocate against parades ("Parades, Circus and Fireworks: if you've seen one you've seen them all.") I will admit that what I saw was unique.

It was four hours plus of a parade of elephants and fire. Fire and elephants. Theatrics with fire. Theatrics with elephants. Elaborate costumes on elephants. Elaborate costumes on people, people with fire. Two hours into it we saw this:

MySister said it best, "I wish this had an accompanying headset like in a museum, to explain all of this." If I had to guess, and that's really all I can do, the middle of the parade with the most elaborate accompaniment had to have been the Tooth. Basically we all stood when the others stood, watched what the others watched, and resigned to the fact that we were in the middle of something huge and important (although none of us fully understood why). Here are a couple pictures I took before my camera battery expired:

Where is your secret place?

We made two significant stops at Sigiriya on the way back to Negombo from Anuradhapura to end the first weekend in Sri Lanka.

First we toured a spice garden, which provided one of the biggest genuine laughs of the trip. Our guide was an older, small, sweet man who gave (at times too long) descriptions of the various spices grown there and its applications. This one was good for headaches, this one gives you more energy, and so on. At the end of the tour (which lasted a little under an hour) the guide was explaining the particular product that was used for hair loss. He mentioned that women use it for their legs and...

And then there was a pause... a long pause.
As someone more immature than most, I knew what he was hinting at. For the goal of reducing any awkwardness, I hoped he'd just move on to the next spice. But the long pause continued - until he decided to break it with: "your secret place." Then all bets were off - I lost it and the fellow teammates and I continued to make "secret place" jokes that would make your ordinary junior high boy proud.

Still laughing from that, we visited the nearby Rock Fortress - the greatest sight of the trip. Built in an amazingly short time (7 years) about 2,000 years ago (give or take a century) it used to house the King of Sri Lanka. To summarize the story read aloud from one of the guide books on the trip: If you build a Rock Fortress, you best stay in it.  As legend has it, the King fell off his horse - leading his horse to instinctively retreat. All of the King's soldiers interpreted the fleeing horse as a signal to retreat - and thus the Fortress was lost.

I, on the other hand, felt like a bona fide conqueror after climbing its 1,200 steps to the top. The feat's reward were the best views of the trip. Next time I do something like this, I'll find a place to change into shorts (the jeans were the only long pants I had on the trip, worn out of respect to the Temples visited prior to the Rock Fortress).