Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Do you really love "travel"?

It's 2:53 AM as I begin this post. While staring at the inside of my eyelids I had a thought - a fake conversation that I'm never going to have in reality. It compelled me to bump my computer out of its sleep and type.

A note to any body who happens to read this with two x chromosomes and is not currently in a relationship - you may want to stop reading now. Also, if you are additionally someone who hasn't yet ruled out me as being potentially attractive - I wholeheartedly beg you to stop reading. what do you like?
I love travel, love.
Oh? Where have you gone?
Nowhere yet, but it's a high priority. It's a goal, I know I'll do it.
I'm sure you will.
Are you being sarcastic?
No, that's a sincere comment... but... Would it be more accurate to say that you love the idea of travel?
Or is your love a blind faith based love.
You don't like travel?
It's great, the limited places I've been.... It's not Rome, but have I mentioned what a gem of a discovery the city of Louisville was?
It's not the same, you haven't been to Europe.
Have you?
You know what I mean.
I have friends that sincerely love to travel - they've been places like Spain and China - it's a thrill for them to be surrounded in a culture that's not American. I think it gives them a perspective on their life.
What's your point?
Is it an escape? What is the fuel behind your passion? My theory is that you are in love with the concept or the idea of travel and since you haven't traveled you obsesses on it's thought.
Wow. You are so cynical.
What if I told you I loved skiing.
Do you?
No. But if I said I did, you'd believe me - right? It's a perfectly normal activity to say to enjoy.
But what if I said I loved skiing, but have never been skiing - wouldn't that be odd?
But you could still want to go skiing. I've never been skydiving but totally want to someday.
Okay, that makes sense - but you don't say you love to skydive and I don't say I love to ski... By the way, I do want to ski someday.
What's wrong with you?
I'm not done with this skiing thing yet. It's a luxury to me, the activity. My family had a few vacations growing up, but it was almost based around a family reunion or wedding. And to be blunt, skiing is an expensive venture - our family wasn't jetting off to Aspen on holiday. Not that there's anything wrong with that. Maybe you can go as far as to think I have a bit of jealousy over those that have skied? I don't know, you know?
Oh go screw yourself.
Why are you so adamant against travel?
I'm not against travel. The highlight of my last month was booking my next airplane ticket. The out of proportion importance of travel, especially among people who haven't traveled to the extent of their preaching baffle me.
Look, I'm not a shut-in. Can't you see how if someone went to the Paris of Kentucky and enjoyed it that it would be safe to assume that it would be more enjoyable on a larger extent? That is why I want to go to Asia and Africa... I've already been to Alabama.
That makes sense.
No shit.
Goodbye. You really have that asshole switch don't you? No wonder you're so great at getting a first date and couldn't get to a fourth without a passport and a map.
They told me my passport would arrive in four to six weeks.
Good luck with that.


  1. For some reason this reminds of something my friend told me about internet dating. He said that EVERYONE says they like traveling on their profile because they think other people like to hear it - even if it's not true. Same with "hanging out" and "having fun." Why not just tell people the truth and say "Watching old Dukes of Hazard episodes with a bag of Lays"???? That's infinitely more interesting.

  2. Is that friend of yours a guy or a girl? Because I can confirm that odd travel-centric-dating-profile... It was the starting point of this post.

    That's a theory I've never heard before, and it totally changes my perception if true... Are these women just putting travel up there because they feel they have to?

    This changes everything.