Thursday, July 8, 2010

Where are Cheerleaders Wanted?

Q: What got me disturbed this afternoon?
A: An odd beckoning for cheerleaders and the good news for slutty moms-to-be.

I saw an odd sign today at the T-intersection where Central Road ends at Howard Street in Skokie:
A white poster board, stencil painted, sign was affixed to the base of Stop sign.
Hanging only 3 feet from the ground, the sign had two words and a 10 digit phone number:
CHEERLEADING TRYOUTS 630-…” (I can’t remember the last seven digits)

The following are the questions that flooded my mind upon seeing this sign:
-Is Dateline NBC just not trying as hard as they used to?
-Who exactly is that desperate to cheer for unknown causes?
-Because “630” is an area code away by a solid forty minutes, how far reaching is this campaign?
-Does this work? Because maybe I should cease all Craigslist operations in favor of this?

Which reminds me:
PITCHFORK SUNDAY TEXTME
(UPDATE: They're sold! In an amazing sequence that took less than 8 hours from CL post to cash in hand!)

Yeah, sad news concert fans. I sold selling another pair of concert tickets – the biggest of them all so far: a pair of tickets to the 3rd ( final) day of the Pitchfork Music Festival (July 18th at Union Park). For those of you scoring at home, that’s now the fourth bought pair of concert tickets that I have had to sell. So far in 2010, I’ve only been to 3 shows (The xx, Tortoise and Machine Gun Mojo). Thankfully I have three more concerts with tickets already acquired that I am very much looking forward to: Cut Copy (their postapalooza show), My Morning Jacket (at the scenic Northerly Island) and Broken Social Scene (road trip to the Pabst Theater in Milwaukee).

In other unsettling news: a coworker told me that Forever 21 now sells maternity clothes. Thank you MTV. I believe that “16 and Pregnant” is as an effective deterrent as Capital Punishment (read: not very effective). So are these expectant moms out clubbing? Are they trying to line up Baby Daddy #2? Ah hell, who am I to prevent women from wanting to look like sluts? Maybe I should give credit to Forever 21 for finding an untapped niche in the market.

Can that last question qualify as a pun joke?

Here is today's TQ's Tweet of the Day:
I hope Kanye West doesn't interrupt Lebons decision reminding that Jordan was the best basketball player ever (@Dinorah_Pena)

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