Thursday, November 12, 2009

What can you not say to a woman?


Q: Isn't this common knowledge?
A: Just in case it isn't to some...

(I'd like you to have this as background music today)

I implore you, gentlemen of the world, to never make the following statement within earshot of a person rocking double x chromosomes:
"In Your Eyes" by Peter Gabriel is a horrible song.

Today I drove to the bank over my lunch hour.
And it wasn't until I pulled into the bank's parking lot did I remember-
-about Veteran's Day.
(less than three hours earlier I wished my boss' boss, a Veteran, a happy one)

On the car ride, before the trip was ruined, the above mentioned song made famous by Say Anything was played on WXRT (Chicago FM 93.1).

A good friend yesterday is done with the FM side of the dial. He said he accidentally hit the "band" button in his car the other day and was disgusted. I don't feel this strongly and wanted to reinforce my not-yet-destroyed opinion of Terrestrial Radio.

Have I convinced you that I don't purposely cruise around the suburbs listening to the various solo efforts from the band Genesis? Truth be told, I really could use a Phil Collins track about now...

I have long joked that the Universal Feminine Love of "In Your Eyes" is the only thing that can rival their U.F.L. of Travel (i.e. "I love travel, I LOVE travel, I. LOVE. TRA. VEL."). Today was the first time in - I don't know how long - I listened to this song from start to finish. Intently listening.

It is a magnificent song.
Worth of the esteem women keep for it.
Of course, I don't believe it's quality is the primary force behind it's inclusion in the upper echelon of Fe-votion.

You've got the scores of women who danced to this song at their Prom.
Then the dateless wonders who watched Say Anything that night instead.

(sigh)

For the record, yours truly didn't go to a Prom of any sort.
Just consider that before you sharpen your knife after that 'dateless wonders' comment.

Listening to "In Your Eyes" today is making me consider a very dangerous question of, "Should I re-watch Say Anything?" What could I gain from watching this? Besides, after my recent viewing of Road House I really can't say my Net Flix queue has any standards. I just don't want the death of John Cusack to have to push my hand in this.

Also for the record, I do not wish for any ill to come to John Cusack. Actually, I really hope he lives until at least the year 2013. God forbid if he dies in the year 2012... It will make us all have to acknowledge that movie again. (I say that like I don't fully expect to see myself in a mega large theater arena watching 2012 in the next month)

Why hasn't John Cusack and Vince Vaughn co-starred in a movie yet? Isn't there some out of work Chicago Meatball writer that's got a screenplay for that already? The thing writes itself doesn't it?

John plays "Jon"
A smirking shy like a fox charmer.

Vince plays "Vin"
A smrking wiseguy skeptical romantic.

Throw in - ah, hell - Kate Hudson for all I care. Along with some young hunk kid that's played some sort of Vampire in the last two years (Not to play a Vampire, but some young coworker / mutual acquaintance of Jon and Vin who is moving in on Meg Rya- I mean Kate Hudson's character).

In the culminating scene - Vin holds up his iPhone high into the air to try to get a better signal.
Jon's call finally comes through to tell him the news we've all known since the first act.
The ringtone: "In Your Eyes."

Which reminds me, how soon are we from a movie in which "texting" becomes such an overwhelming motif in a plot that it's almost its own character? How come I have yet to see an iPhone being used on the Big Screen?

The most popular thesis from the NYU Film School Class of 2039:
The Use of The Text Message As A Thematic Vehicle

Two months ago someone I had met two hours earlier asked me, "You know who you look like?"
I was very thankful that the answer in my mind was not the answer in hers!
The nightmare of my bad Hollywood actor association may be done.
His name will not be mentioned here, because I really think nobody knows who that SLC Punk is anymore (that's a clue if anybody really needs to know).

It wasn't the first time that someone has compared my looks to that of Vince Vaughn.
The first person was actually a middle aged man, who was refereeing a park district league basketball game.
This latest correlation, from an attractive woman in a bowling alley, was a lot less creepy than that first (a balding man on a basketball court).
I'm a somewhat taller guy with sideburns - I honestly think that's all the factors being used for these people... I have no delusions of grandeur that I actually look like him.

There is a song on my iPod called "In Your Eyes."
It's not a cover - an entirely different song - by Kylie Minogue.

Who, by the way, is Australian. If you read my last post (thank you if you did) you know that those Aussies get me moving. (A asked a native of that continent what he thought of my self made labels - and he preferred "Great Barrier Beats")

Since I almost feel that I need to, here's the original music video of the song that inspired this late night serpentine of mindlessness...

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