Monday, June 1, 2009

Exactly where does your mind run to when in neutral?

Q: What are your favorite kinds of posts?
A: The ones that make the least sense.

Let's start this mess off with a rundown of my Netflix activity
Or lack thereof
As you can see

I've not been getting my money's worth
On December 16 I received a couple movies
That weren't watched and returned until February 25
The next two I got spent another 6 or so weeks gathering dust
Then, after another 7 week hiatus I went on a tear
I only watched four movies in the first four plus months of this year
Six were viewed since Memorial Day Weekend
The above list doesn't count the two I watched "instantly" on my computer
Those movies were JCVD (which was awful like no other)
And How to Rob a Bank
JCVD and Chop Shop were quit less than a half hour into the "feature"
I watched all of that formulaic bank heist flick
Only because I will watch nearly anything featuring Erika Christensen

I have made fun of women who watch with their ovaries
Giving any film a good rating if there's a hot ass in there
I'm not too far from that
How to Rob A Bank, even with the beauty of Erika, is still awful
This latest push to watch a lot of NetFlix
Was an affront to a passing thought of canceling my account
It was a close call
My logical mind was trying to tell me it was a waste of money
Good thing we weathered that storm
Up next: Throat Punching Liam Neeson in Taken
Then it's back to "legitimate" fair like Revolutionary Road and Frost/Nixon
* * * *
Turns out my Mom likes Coldplay
It was a shocking development
Causing me to laugh
Around the world, millions felt a sudden feeling of justification
You need to understand something first
My Mom doesn't like music
She'll sing in church
But she owns zero musical albums
She can't even fathom why anybody would want to own a piece of music
Her car radio only talks
We were walking out of a restaurant a few Sundays ago
(More on that in a bit, the restaurant)
"Speed of Sound" was playing over a loud speaker
My mom wanted to know who sang the song
And after I told her, she said she liked it
As it turns out, it's only telling half the story
My Mom doesn't so much as like Coldplay
My Mom adores Joe Scarborough

Morning Joe is one of my Mother's favorite shows
Although not a conservative republican, my mom likes Joe
Turns out "Speed of Sound" is frequently used as a musical bump
That is, the song playing the show in and out of commercials
I offered to make my Mom a Coldplay mixtape
She refused
(Remember that Restaurant)
I ordered a pulled pork BBQ sandwich
It's becoming "the thing I order" out of nowhere
The sandwich was universally ignored by me for 25+ years
It's not been ordered at 3 different restaurants
Over established and trusted favorites
* * * *
This weekend is the annual Taste of Des Plaines
Do you love Des Plaines
Do you heart Des Plaines

I've been a resident of this City of Destiny for over 3 years
Every year since I can make this claim I walk over to "The real taste"
I call it that, of course not seriously, to coworkers
The bar is rather low to entertain me there
As long as there are at least two other people there that I know
* * * *
I'm golfing again
Invested in lessons again
The lessons are over
The investments aren't
Callaway had a dynamite promotion
Buy a Driver, get a 3 Wood or a Hybrid for $1
It ended with the month of May
Causing me to drive through rush hour to Mundelein
I had to consult with the best golf mind I know
Who also, thankfully, had special coupons that could be used at any time
My initial Driver and 3 Wood cost me a total of $30
Replacing them cost just over nine times that figure
Even though I have been told many times since then
By numerous people
How great a deal it was
I still had reservations, a tad bit of buyer's remorse
But all that negativity evaporated on the fairway of its 3rd hole
Here's a picture of what I got

I credit this club for helping me achieve my best score to date
Looking to make a new record this Friday
About two and a half weeks ago, I was regretting the entire golf venture
Thankfully, like my NetFlix cancellation thoughts, the feeling also passed
* * * *
I remember the first time I ever had to write off the top of my head
It was my Writing class my freshman year of high school
We had to write a journal
Like now, I never knew what to write
I remember writing reviews of Late Night with Conan O'Brien
The show had just begun that first week of my high school career
As I'm writing this I'm watching his first Tonight Show
Goodnight, hopefully it won't be another week plus before I post again

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